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Barbie Maniscalco

Everything Has a Message

0 April 7, 2017 All Posts (Main)

Postcards and Billboards (day 38)

April 7, 2017 (day 38)
Another late post. And better late than never.  I snapped this photo early this morning. Postcard waiting for me first thing.  I love that.

Full plate life brought me to the airport again this evening to deliver my college student and his four great friends for their spring break trip to Florida. I pause to say a prayer for them all, and the gift is that what used to be shear panic and basic freak the f out…I enjoyed the ride. The laughter. Took a selfie with them and went on my merry way. Back for my movie date with my visitor, and I don’t look back. This is big stuff for the mama who had a hard time letting the high school senior go an hour away on his own to an accepted college visit. And as I let go, what joy there is in having a new relationship along with being present to the gifts in his life. By letting him live it. Great friendships. Abundant laughter. Navigating the hard stuff with a circle of their people. Oh have I had some coaching here. And thank goodness for my coaches. Every single one of them. Encouraging me to step out of my comfort zone. Do my homework. Live with intention. And to trust in the flow and process.

In doing JUST THAT, I see the pattern. I think how can it get better than THIS? It does.
An important footnote: it’s not all rainbows and unicorns people. There is always the life is messy laboratory. And if you wait it out, the silver lining reveals itself. I’m still not wearing makeup because I have no idea when the cloudburst of grief might move through. They are fewer, but boy did a good Celine Dion song at the end of Beauty and the Beast in 3D bring it on this evening. And that’s okay. Will can see his Aunt cry. Gives him permission to do the same.
I have reliable sources in my life that tell me: you CAN have it all. And the “it all” is different for each of us. I am on the road and aware that there is one voice that always says THIS OR THAT…and another that says right behind it, oh no, BOTH/AND.

One of my first wise teachers asked me how much I loved our boys and could I see how MUCH MORE I wanted for them. Yes, of course. Well, you are THAT loved and God, goodness, capital L love wants MUCH MORE for you too she would say. More than you can even see for yourself. I will say, every limitation or excuse I have put out there around work, relationships, geography, money is like a balloon popping. How about this? Bam. That. Bam. And just like that, it keeps getting better. As I get older I see that I may just be paying attention more. And it does not have anything to do with the coffee.

xo, b
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Categories: All Posts (Main) Tags: #postcardsandbillboards

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